The Bucket Digest

  "To not give a fuck is to stare down life's most terrifying and difficult actions and still take action..." If you read our last article covering Manson's self-help book, see [link], then you know that when Mark said to "not try" he meant to not try and avoid the negative experiences associated with life that we are so afraid to face--   and instead, tackle them head-on by "not giving a fuck." As to what that entails, we'll cover it later.  In the meantime, tell me if this sounds familiar: "[You] give too many fucks in situations where fucks do not deserve to be given..." I think that's something that all of us can relate to. Instead of caring about insignificant things, Manson advises:      "[learn] how to focus and prioritize your thoughts effectively- how to pick and choose what matters to you and what does not matter to you based on finely honed personal values...it is perhaps the most worthy struggle one can undertake

  Wait ... what ?  Did I read that right?  "It's a Negative Experience Wanting A Positive Experience" Last Monday, we covered Mark Manson's "Feedback Loop From Hell," but that was only the beginning of the bizarreness and eccentricity evident throughout the pages of this book that I can't help but continue reading.  The more I follow his words, the more connected I feel to Manson, almost as if he's describing me, and my problems, within the chapters and their subcategories piece-by-piece, shrinking the puzzle of my life into something so insubstantial, yet positively so. How the  heck  does he accomplish that...? I'll tell you: He Introduces the Backwards Law (Philosopher Alan Watts) The title of this post, "It's A Negative Experience Wanting A Positive Experience," is  an  example of the  B ackwards Law.   Confusing I know...  but listen to this,           "[The Backwards Law is] an idea that the more you pursue feeling better

  It's called the Feedback Loop From Hell... As Manson, author of the acclaimed self-help book  The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck  dubs it, "[It's] an insidious quirk to your brain that, if you let it, can drive you absolutely batty." You're anxious around people, you wonder why, and then become anxious about being anxious. You're angry at how easily you anger, making you even more so.  You feel guilty for any mistake you make and are then driven to feel even more guilty because you feel guilty for feeling guilty.  Those are just a few of the examples Manson provided, and if you're like me, just reading that makes your head spin.  The Feedback Loop From Hell makes a lot of sense now... His advice? Don't give a F*** "By not giving a fuck that you feel bad, you short-circuit the Feedback Loop From Hell; you say to yourself, "I feel like shit, but who gives a fuck?'" And then you stop hating yourself. It's logic like this that I i

 An excerpt from Mark Manson's self-help book titled, "The Subtle Art Of Not Giving A #@%!" instilled within me a realization I'd never truly considered:      "When you stop and really think about it, conventional life advice- all the positive and happy self-help stuff we hear all the time- is actually fixating on what you  lack . It lasers in on  what you perceive your personal shortcomings and failures to already be , and then emphasizes them for you. You stand in front of the mirror and repeat affirmations saying that you're beautiful  because  you feel as though you're not beautiful already. You follow dating and relationship advice  because  you feel that you're unlovable already. You try goofy visualization exercises about being more successful  because  you feel as though you aren't successful enough already.      Ironically, this fixation on the positive- on what's better, what's superior- only serves to remind us over and over aga

         A single drop of rain is so small, gathered its force is so strong, but even then, the sound of those drops hitting the concrete scream of loneliness.       Rain mutes the sky to gray like I try to mute my overwhelming emotions. After so long, I can't figure out how to deal with them, so I let them deal with me. I'm tired because of the rain. I'm melancholy because of the rain.       Does it ever pass? When it does, why does it only stay for a short time; the sun? Even on sunny days, the sadness gathers in the clouds above, waiting to come down onto the days' happiness. I can be so good for so long, and then, so suddenly it waves upon me.       I don't know how to clear the rain. I try to focus on myself, on my hobbies, doing something other than focusing on the drip. the drip of those oncoming emotions, yet they come despite my struggle against them.      Have you ever seen your shadow in the rain? You can see it, you know, just before the sun fades to gra

  Did you know that 93% of homes have a junk drawer? I too am part of this statistic, but rather than a drawer, I put my junk in buckets.  Why a bucket?  Really, the better, often overused question is,  why not ?  They're readily available (after finishing off the kids' cheese puffs), closeable, and can be packed away out of site under my kitchen cabinets. I mention this because... I want you to think of this site as a junk bucket. It's more or less filled with belongings of similar uses, but don't be surprised if there's something completely off-the-wall unrelated. A sort of ensuing chaos, but not the bad kind. The kind that keeps you entertained, thoughtful, aware... Words to provide direction, words to provide insight, consciousness, thoughtfulness, empathy, sincerity... Words to remind us of our human capabilities, ingenuities, and perspectives. At  The Bucket Digest...   we speak of art and writing, our lives, and the lives of others in the hopes of creating a

Businesses hate when you apply to their job for the pay.  It's something that used to stump me every time I had an interview, "what are you hoping to gain from the company"... when mostly, I was hoping for a paycheck. But that's something you never admit.  There needs to be a higher motive when you apply for a job...  And here are two great answers you can give to this question: 1. Character Development Think about the role and how it will shape your character.  What qualities will it bring it out in you?  Discuss these.  2. Skill Set What particular skills will you gain/improve?  Let's put these answers in a real-world example.  I recently applied for a full-time job at my local Planet Fitness. They hire  in-company  if you're interested in moving up the ranks... which is something that I could benefit from in the long run.  My answer to this question (i.e., "what are you hoping to gain from the company?") might be something like, "I want to st

There's nothing more annoying than being looked down on... even if it's not  wholly  intentional... Phrases like, "it's nice to have  dreams ..."  or "are you sure that's a good idea?" come to mind.  Maybe it's because I'm a woman.  Emotional, reckless, lazy.  What value and drive could I have? I mean,  seriously?   I've never been so disappointed... truly, what a mindset- that  women  are incapable.  When we've birthed life...  ...raised generations.  We've protested, invented, worked ourselves to the bone... We've cried for justice and demanded change.  Women are leaders in this world...  And I can be one too! So, I won't let anyone's doubt settle into my brain... ...I'll use it to fuel my desire instead.  Haters will hate, but they will do so without ambition for themselves. How they look at others, especially someone close... Says more about themselves than the person they doubt. Because hate stems from envy...